6 months

My dearest Max,

I've decided to cut myself some slack on posting a letter to you ON your month birthday... why does it matter, I suppose?

I'm sort of in denial that you are already 6 months old. I've heard the next 6 months go by even faster than the first. That makes my want to cry. Though I love each stage you've gone through, and I know there is so much more I can't even imagine that will bring such joy, I find myself mourning each day because that day with you is over. Never again will we get to live August 4th, 2010... December 25th, 2010... and now February 4th, 2011- you as the sweetest 6 month old I've ever met in my life, and I have moments of deep maternal sadness as I just want to keep you in my arms forever.

I've realized, now more than ever, that with great joy comes great fear- the more we have, the more we have to lose. Yet I would not trade a second with you for anything on Earth or in Heaven. I know, as you grow, there will be painful moments, tender moments, angry moments; though I wish it weren't so, I know we will both probably say things we don't mean, slam doors when we frustrate each other, or be impatient when we should be slow to judge or anger.

Yet I also know there will be many more moments of sweetness, of pride and of LOVE. Max, I will NEVER STOP LOVING YOU. There is nothing you could EVER do to make your Daddy or I stop loving and fighting for you. You are our greatest joy, our sweetest downfall, and the best gift we've ever been given.

I often look at you in amazement and wonder what on Earth I did to deserve you. I say to God, "You mean I get to borrow him from You? You trust me enough to care for him?" It is both a great honor and a terrifying undertaking that I/we've been given you.

I know this little note is a bit "deep', but I just want you to know how DEEPLY we love you and treasure you.

My parents (Mimi and Grampa) used to say this to me all the time, and now I say it to you every night before you go to sleep: "Mommy loves you; Daddy loves you; and Jesus loves you most of all. And there is NOTHING you could EVER do to make any of us stop loving you." Never have I understood more the fierceness with which a mother loves, and never have your Daddy and I loved something so small so very much.

So while I mourn that these first 6 months are over, I DELIGHT in all that is yet to come. You, Max, are the best thing that's ever happened to us.

Jumpin'

Sorta long, but cute :)

Another video... I'm obsessed.

Ok so now that I know how to really use iMovie, I'm going a little crazy.
Here is my newest video...
Meal Time.

A little video just for Maxers..

Max is 5 months and dang it, I'm writing him a letter!

My precious sweet Maxers,

As I said before, I recognize I didn't write you a letter at 4 months, but man did we have a good time. It was your first Holiday season, and it's never been more special or magical now that we have you. You sat in your big boy high chair for the first time on Thanksgiving, tried rice cereal and some vegetables, spent the night at Gigi and Papa's on Christmas Eve, and attended your Great-Grandma Norma's Memorial service.

You still aren't sleeping through the night, much to my dismay. I just can't do the whole cry-it-out thing... but we have started a process of weaning you off nighttime feedings by slowly reducing the time I feed you. We're off the 11pm feeding: sometimes you wake up but we can easily gt you back to sleep with a soft pet of your head and a reinsertion of your paci :) We're still working on the 3/4am feed, but even after than you'll stay asleep until about 7:30/8am.

This month you had your first real infection that caused us to visit the Immediate Care center not once but twice. The fist visit was on the 19th and you were diagnosed with a right ear infection and upper respiratory infection. We reluctantly put your on an antibiotic for a few days and thankfully your ear cleared up. But on the night of Christmas, you started screaming like I've never heard you scream and were pulling on your right ear again. So we were back to the Immediate Care where they said your ears looked great (whew!) so you were probably working on a tooth. We have yet to see this elusive tooth that's supposedly been working its way out for the past month... you are still cute nonetheless :)

We spent some time with friends who have a little buddy of yours who is just about 8 weeks younger than you. Never before have I mourned your "littleness" than on our most recent visit. Eli is the size I picture you as being, but seeing you next to him made both your Daddy and I realize what a big boy you're becoming! And while I'm sure I'll look back at pictures of you when you were 5 months old and think you were just so small, it's just kind of sinking in that you will never ever be little again.

But I digress- every day is a new discovery for you, and new skill mastered or one starting to develop. Your smile in contagious and so easily appears, especially at your Daddy. You need only hear his voice and your face just lights up. You think he is probably the funniest person alive, though your Grampa is a close second :)

We have so many funny nicknames for your- Maxasaurus Rex, Tyrannosaurus Max, Maxers, Maxaronni, Mr. Baby, Bubbas, and my personal favorite, the Tiny Human. It's all in love of course, but I am interested to see what sticks.

What a fun month we've had... I can't wait to see what you'll surprise us with next!

Love,
Mama

Where oh where have I been...

Every time I would go online I'd see my blog (it's our homepage) and think, "I need to update this."

Then I'd say I'd do it later.

Then the task became quite daunting, so I kept putting it off.

Now I don't even know where to start.

Timeline? I think so...


12.2.10
4 month check-up
15.2lbs, 25", 43cm head (50th% for all three!)

12.6.10

Tries rice cereal and LOVES it!

12.9.10

Eli Lilly flew me to Texas to interview for a pharma sales position. Though the interview went really well, I found out on my birthday (:-/) that they ended up needing to honor some transfers so I did not get the job. While it was a huge disappointment, I'm still so grateful I have the best job in the world- Max's Mama and Ben's wife!

12.12.10

Tries squash

12.14.10

Athena's 2nd Birthday :)

12.16.10

My 28th birthday

I got a glider for Max's room!!! My Mom and I had lunch & got mani/pedis, and then Ben and I went to the Gold Class Cinema at the Arboretum... I don't think I will ever be able to watch a movie like a normal person again.

12.17.10

Tries peas

12.19.10

Tries sweet potatoes

First visit to Immediate Care with fever- diagnosed with upper respiratory and ear infection. Weighed in at 15lbs 9 oz :)

12.22.10

Made Christmas cookies with Mimi, Uncle Ryan and Grampa

12.23.10

Tries prunes

12.24.10

Christmas service at church

Annual Christmas Eve part at Gigi and Papa's house

Spent the night at Gigi and Papa's for Christmas

12.25.10

First Christmas!

Later that night, we were back to Immediate Care with what I thought was ear pain- thankfully his ears were actually looking great so it was most likely acute teething. Call me a crazy first-time Mom, but when my baby is screaming like he's never screamed before and pulling like crazy at the ear that had the infection, I'm gonna take my him to get checked out.

 Still a sweetie at the Immediate Care Center!

12.27.10

Slept from 7pm-3:30am then 4am-7:30am!!!

12.29.10

Drove up to Milwaukee for Great-Grandma Norma's Memorial Service

Met Grampa Poling's whole side of the family!

 Car ride to WI

 Dinner at PF Chang's

My handsome guys

 First time in a big kid high chair! He slid around a lot, but it was cute for the few minutes we had him in it.

 Kinda over the high-chair

But back to his happy self once Daddy started making faces :)

And that about sums up December! I'm looking forward to actually doing something tomorrow night for New Year's Eve as last year I was SO sick from being pregnant we just stayed in. Additionally, I fully intend to update more

I also want to note, for Max's sake, I'm aware I did not write his 4 month letter. Sweetie, your 4th month was awesome and I love you.
The End.

:)

Norma May Flickinger Poling: 1/3/15-11/29/10

After a long and full life, my beautiful Grandmother passed away this past week just shy of her 96th birthday. She had been relatively healthy up until September- she had a serious brain infection that caused her to have a seizure and never quite recovered.

When it was evident she needed around the clock care, my family moved her to Manor Care down here in Elgin and I am so grateful to have gotten to see her multiple times in her last few weeks.

She leaves behind her four children (my Dad was her youngest) and their spouses, 7 Grandchildren and their (our) spouses, and 15 Great-Grandchildren. She was the oldest of 5 children and her 3 sisters are still living, but her brother passed away a while back.

I am so glad she was able to celebrate Max's birth with us and that, even though he won't remember her, he still got to meet and be loved on by her. His first overnight away from home was at her house when he and I drove up there :)

Meeting Mr. Max

My Mom, Grandma and I at Max's Baby Shower

Gram at our Wedding

I love you Grandma Norma. I hope you are dancing in Heaven, fully restored and enjoying being in His presence!